He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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