in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
she smelled like a LAN party
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
