Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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