sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
