OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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