Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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