your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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