Sponge bath it is.
ugly people sure do ruin things
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
