would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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