I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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