East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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