I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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