The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
