Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
