You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize