can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
