Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
