Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize