Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
