belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
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