Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
