think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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