When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
