I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
