I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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