Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
