How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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