a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
