people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
