ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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