i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
