I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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