Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
