he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize
