you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
