I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize