Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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