My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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