I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize