There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
