no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize