question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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