Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
