Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize