ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
