I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
