I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
