someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Randomize
