I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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