"it" just moved
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
